S.I.C.K.
TOP TEN THINGS ABOUT BEING FLAT-ON-YOUR-BACK SICK WITH PNEUMONIA:
10) You develop a cough louder than your average truck horn, and are able to stop traffic with a single chest heave.
9) No appetite = effortless weight loss!
8) Unable to get up off couch = excuse to catch up on the entire third season of Lost, which has been stagnating on your Tivo since January.
7) (Unfortunately, none of the many drugs prescribed help make any sense of what's going on on Lost.)
6) Steroids prescribed for horrible chest congestion might lead to increase in muscle mass?
5) 103 degree fevers relieve a mother from having to bathe young children.
4) 103 degree fevers also = good reason to eat popsicles.
3) Horrible sickness = good excuse to want to cut other mothers with a knife if they dare look at me sideways while I'm creating a 10-foot perimiter of unshowered, unclean, barely erect stench while walking my child into preschool.
2) Although rather disconcerting, the crackling, snapping sound coming from deep in my chest while I lie down does evoke pleasant childhood memories of Rice Krispies.
1) Unable to celebrate your birthday? That means it was no birthday at all! In all fairness, chronological age remains at 36, not advancing to 37.
Ugh...I'm so sorry you have/had pneumonia. I had it two summers ago (yes, pneumonia in the summer...who knew??) and it was awful. I was S.I.C.K. for the last two weeks of summer vacation; I started to feel better about the time school started again (I'm a teacher...bad timing...) but wasn't allowed back to school for the first three weeks of the year. It was AWFUL. I totally remember the Rice Krispies thing; I thought it was just me. I remember going into a huge coughing fit in early October and thinking, "OMG, this is as good as I'm ever going to be. I'm never going to be back to normal." However, before I knew it, I was back to normal. Went into a panic anytime I got a cold for the next year, but now I don't even notice the sniffles. You will eventually get better. And pshaw to those moms giving you dirty looks - little do they know what you're dealing with.
Just so you know, snarkywood.com got me through the depression of not being able to spend the last two weeks of summer with my kids. I couldn't get out of bed (couldn't lie down either, for fear of drowning in my own lungs...I slept sitting up for 17 nights in a row!!!) so I would just sit there with my computer in my lap. Granted, Snarkywood started some horrible coughing fits, but at least they started with laughter.
Feel better soon.
Posted by: JZMom | April 09, 2008 at 04:49 PM
Feel better soon, Martha. And, am I allowed to wish you a happy birthday if it didn't happen. I'm not sure of the proper ettiquette.
Posted by: Kris | April 09, 2008 at 04:50 PM
OMG SUCK. So sorry.
Shall I send you my nebulizer? So helpful.
Cupcakes to be sent when you feel better. :)
Posted by: Pammer | April 09, 2008 at 06:53 PM
Oh misery! Feel better! (Like you have control over that, right?)
Posted by: HG | April 10, 2008 at 04:33 AM
At least you can look on the bright side...
FEEL BETTER!!! :)
Posted by: JenBun | April 10, 2008 at 10:24 AM
I lost 10 pounds when I had pneumonia a few years ago. Can I come over and share a beverage with you?
Posted by: Superfantastic | April 11, 2008 at 03:29 PM
Thank you for letting me lurk, you won't believe how I found this post. I Googled, "My lungs sounds like rice krispies" just to see if anyone knew precisely what this felt like! You have been more helpful than Webmd. I haven't been to the doctor yet, but have been sick for four days and it's awful. I have a dissertation to finish in the next two weeks. Send your prayers for me care of the Rice Krispies club. Best, Lisa
Posted by: Lisa | May 04, 2008 at 07:51 AM